The darkest hour has a way of exposing your pain.
The darkest hour knows how to make you look him in his face. The darkest hour separates the weak from the strong because he will either make you strong or tear you apart.
I made it past the darkest hour because I’m here today and so did you. But the funny thing about the darkest hour is that when you think you’ve met him sometimes he come back stronger and with a vengeance.
When you meet him again you have to be strong. We often find ourselves caving our pain inside and taking on the world with an artificial confidence. In order to be prepared for the darkest hour we have to let go of the pain from the past because healing builds strength. When you are able to walk away from a closed door with closure then you will be equipped to face whatever is in store in the next door.
When you have a better outlook on life it’s easier to get past challenges because you know that pain comes and go. With wisdom you can approach any obstacle with a warrior mentality. The warrior mentality is the mentality that you can conquer any obstacle that comes your way.
When the darkest hour comes know that an hour is only a spec in time and you can get through it.
When I tell you that I was happy yesterday, trust me I was happy.
I wasn’t happy because of any circumstance, but I chose to be happy. This brings me to what I would like to discuss today; I would like to discuss forgiveness.
At times when we are hurt we dwell on things that have happened to us in our past and we replay these images in our mind. For the past 5 years I have been struggling with anxiety and yesterday I decided to let go.
The reason why I couldn’t let go of anxiety for so long was because I was holding to my past to the point where I was beginning to lose hope of my future. I constantly replayed clips in my mind of those who have hurt me and these thoughts were draining out all of my power.
Today I am here to tell you that whatever it is that is bringing you down, let it go. Last night I prayed and forgave those who have hurt me until I felt inner peace. For years I wanted them to see my pain and hoped that they would feel bad for what they have done to me, but they were busy continuing their lives.
When we give people that power over us we are telling ourselves that we are not worthy of joy. No one can steal your joy from you once you find it in your heart. I have committed myself to thank God every day for what he has done for me.
Yesterday I choose to let go; I didn’t let go for those who have hurt me but for myself. I decided to let go of the pain, anxiety, fear and be strong. I am not strong because of what I have been though; I am strong because I decided not to let the pain hold me back.
I know every day isn’t going to be daisies and sunshine but I am determined to lift my spirit despite what I face. Yesterday I said no to negativity; Every time I think a negative thought I re-evaluate myself and ask God to give me a clean heart. Today I decide to choose to forgive and let your soul free.
When it seems as if everything is going wrong it may be hard to be positive. As I face disappointment after disappointment there are days when I feel weary. I pray, try to treat others the way I want to be treated and humble myself but some days I feel broken. I look at the things that I am still struggling with and wonder how come I haven’t got past this struggle.
I have committed myself to change but, it seems as if some things just haven’t changed yet. I look in the mirror in the morning with fear, hope, and expectancy; sometimes I look in the mirror after a long day with shame and discouragement.
This was becoming a daily routine for me day after day for the past few weeks.
I am proud of the fact that I decided to take the measures to make change in my life but, there was still something holding me back.
Although, I gave up my negative ways I was still stuck in the same struggles from it. The problem wasn’t the people who hurt me in my life; the problem was within me. The negative thoughts that I gave energy to was becoming my reality.
I was living a make believe world life in my mind that affected my actions in real life. When I took off the lens of my make believe world I saw that the problems that I saw where never there to begin with. I failed to see all of the positive people that actually where there the whole time and the things that God had blessed me with all along.
I may not be where I want to be but I have come a long way from where I started. Whenever you feel that all of the odds are against you I dare you to take a moment to really think about the things that are. If you are reading this you are already blessed because that means that you made it to see another day. Acknowledge the good things in your life and be blessed.