10 Things You May Not Know About Me

If you think you got me figured out, you don’t so keep reading so I can tell you who I really am.

I don’t know if you guys know this but, I truly appreciate my all of my supporters. If you know anything about me or read any of my previous post, then you’ll know that life has been a rocky road for me. Even though I’ve shared a lot with you all, I still feel like there is a lot of things that most people don’t know about me.

So for all of you that don’t know, I’ve came up with a list of ten things that most people don’t know about me so you can get to know me a little better.

  1. I’ve struggled with anxiety for the past eight years: If you’ve read any of my older post you would know that I’ve struggled with anxiety very severely through out high school and college. Since graduating college I’ve gotten a lot better at managing my stress levels and keeping anxiety to a minimum. When I was in high school this had a major toll on my social life because I lived in this big bubble. I was supper suspicious of the intentions of my peers and I victimized myself. When I went away to college my anxiety went up a notch. It came to a point were I didn’t even want to leave my room. I isolated myself from a lot of people and I had a rough time keeping things together. This got a little better when I started going to counseling but, things really started turning around when I made God the head of my life. Once I did that I was able to change my mind. Once I moved into my first place, I saw a major change in my confidence and mental state. Being able to control the energy in your home was the best thing for me because it gave me a safe place to recover from the daily stressed of life. I don’t have much company because I like to be conscious of the energy that is in my home.
  2. I talk a lot… No really… a lot: If you ever got a chance to get close to me then you would know that I can go on an on for hours. I am usually quiet around most people but, when I am in my element, I can talk about anything. I’ve been through a lot so it is easy for me to relate to almost anything. I’m really good a holding a conversation if I’m comfortable enough. I’m still learning how to let my wall down so more people can see this side of me but, it’s a process.
  3. I’ve lived in over 10 different places growing up in my child hood: Yes. I have always been the new kid in school. This has helped and hindered me in many ways. Some of the perks of always being the new kid is being able to get a fresh start all the time. Learning more about different types of people gave me a better understanding of how someone’s environment can impact their character. Lastly, it makes you a more open-minded and adaptable person. Some cons of being the new kid all the time is that I struggle making lifelong friends because I always saw people as temporary. It takes me longer to warm up to people because I got tired of people coming in and out of my life.
  4. I have a twin: I would think that more people would know this but, surprising a lot of people don’t. Maybe because we didn’t always grow up in the same home or went to school together sometimes. My twin is a guy which I like because we are the same but, so different. I always felt like some twins identity get lost in the others but, we don’t have that problem. He lives in Philadelphia and I live in Queens so we don’t see each other that often. He is more daring and free spirited while I am more structured and strategic. Overall we are very close and we balance each other out.
  5. I started writing poetry in my closet at the age of 12: Most people I come across my age always wonder how I managed to always know what I wanted to do in life. When I was younger I always believed that writing saved me because, it gave my a voice. It allowed me to articulate how I felt and what I was going through in a way that I couldn’t do with words. I started getting into to poetry heavy and then I started writing hate letters. In these letters I would let out everything I feel about someone who hurt me and I often did this in my closet. I started writing in my closet because that was the only place that I could go for privacy. At the time my mom had a one bedroom apartment and I shared a room with two of my sisters and my brother while my mom sectioned off the living room for her and her husband at the time. This was the place where it all started.
  6. I had my first job at 12: It all started when I was walking home from school one day. I literally lived across the street from my middle school at the time. When I crossed the street I had to pass a building and a parking lot to get to my building. There was this guy standing outside a mini van passing out fliers asking who wants to make money. I was walking with my brother at the time and we was anxious to make some money. My mom struggled because this was around the time when she got a divorce so we called the number. My brother had a lot of friends in our building so we all sat in the living room and talked about it. One of his friends worked for the guy and he told us that all we had to do was sell a bin of candy, candles, peanut and other dumb stuff door to door. When we started we were making like 30-80 dollars a day after school. The man would take a large percentage of our sales and give $1.75 of what we made for each item that cost $8. Yes it was dangerous but, we were young and dumb so we didn’t care.
  7. My biggest insecurity is the birthmark on my chest: Yes, I have a birthmark on my chest that I never show. This is why I don’t take advantage of my small breast by showing cleavage or anything. I am learning to accept it but, it always bothered me. It is about the length of the tip of my pinky finger, brown and sticks out a little. Most of my friends tell me that I should embrace it but, I still have to learn to accept it. It is literally in the middle of my breast and I always thought that it ways just in a weird place. I hate when it is touched and it is very sensitive.
  8. I have a sister that doesn’t know I exist: This is the one thing that not even most of my friends don’t know because its one of those things that’s just a sensitive topic for my family. When I was younger one of my sisters was adopted by another family when my mom got arrested. My family couldn’t afford to take care of her because their were many complications with her birth so a family friend who couldn’t have children volunteered to take her in. To make a long story short, my mom thought that it would be temporary and didn’t pay attention to the paper work, basically signing over her rights to the lady. Once she got full custody she took my sister out of the state and we’ve never seen her since. I’ve heard that my sister has been doing really good from family friends who is still in contact with the lady but, I try to look at the bright side. I’m thankful that she didn’t have to go through half of the things my other siblings and I went through. I just know when she does find out, I am ready to open my arms to her and embrace her as my little sister.
  9. I was atheist at one point in my life: I know for most people this one may be hard to believe because I have an amazing relationship with God now but, it hasn’t always been like that. At one point in my life I didn’t know what to believe. I spent many late nights scared to die because I thought that dead would be the end for everything. I would ask God if he was real then reveal himself to me and nothing would happen. As time went on, things that were not natural began happening to me and I told God I see you know. I was put in situations were the people I love and I  weren’t suppose to make it and now I am here able to share my story with you.
  10. I’ve been homeless before: There were times when I was sleeping on someone’s blow up mattress homeless and sleeping in shelters homeless throughout my life. When I was 4 years old my mom, brother and I were in at least three different shelters. At the time I loved it because my mom never let us see the hardship behind it. The only memories I have of living there was playing with other children and traveling different places. When I got older I became homeless again after I graduated college. My mom and I got into a big fight after I moved back from Atlanta and I stayed with someone from the church sleeping on their air mattress. Luckily, I left my moms house when I just started my new job so, I was able to move in my first place in three months by saving up my money.

So with these ten facts about me, you can get to know me a little better. I’ve always struggled with opening up so what is a better way to open up then telling you ten things that most people don’t know about me.

21 Comments

  1. HI! totally random and weird, but I relate to all of these, I also talk a lot too, and and i love talking, lets be friends?! if you don’t mind me asking, what part of Africa is your family from? 🙂

    -B-

  2. I really love your story so open and honest really helpful to I love to read how others feel regarding there anxiety to help my kids with there’s I always worry I make it worse when I know that is not really true it just comes a different story times

    1. It’s not your fault. Everyone just reacts to the daily stresses in life differently. It helps to have an outlet outside of your family to talk to about it. Sometimes as kids you feel your family won’t understand. If they find something they love to channel what they’re feeling it can help. Writing helps me.

      1. Another thing is one of the biggest mistakes that my family made was making me think something was wrong with me. At the time I resented them for that. Let them know that it is common and can be overcome.

      2. Our elves helped to find a way to talk about the emotions they feel when they had several panic attacks thankfully those full on ones are less now for both the kid my daughter used to have about 20+ a day they still have the anxiety but it is a lot better than it was

      3. I use to have those too. Thank God I haven’t had one in a few years but, I know how it feels. They will get through it. It’s just a long process. It took me 8 years to be able to manage it to the point where I can catch myself before I let it rise.

      4. The trigger for both mine was bullying at school but now there is support I am not being called to go pick them up.took a very long time my daughter had meds for a while but not anymore thanks for talking.

      5. Yea. I’m not the biggest fan of meds. I went to counseling and that helped me. I’m a full advocate of support. I’ve never been bullied but I struggled when kids talked about me at a time and that was when it started for me. Trauma can do that to anyone.

      6. My family recommended med to me 4 years ago and til this day I’m glad I never took it because I’ve came far without them. Some of my friends take them but I know everyone’s case is different.

  3. Your on your way, choosing all the time, what’s right for you and what isn’t. You’ll keep growing on the inside, And I have a strong feeling that you’ll learn to accept that life itself is a miracle, and that you have a lot of what it takes to enjoy it. Keep on writing. It’s a good exercise for the soul. You might enjoy reading a book I loved, ‘Straight Life’ by Art Pepper.

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